Be Thankful Anyway

I do not have to tell you this because you already know it…but I will say it anyway…sometimes things just do not go as planned. The unexpected pops up, another hardship comes after a long line of hardships, things seem to be on the up-and-up when all of a sudden there’s a backslide. I get it.

One of my day-to-day mottos for myself is to be thankful anyway. I have a list of things I am thankful for on an on-going basis. It’s like my go-to list when things seem to be on the fritz. If the kids and I are out of sorts, I go to my list. If hubby and I aren’t on the same page about something and we are waiting out a compromise, I go to my list. When there’s more month than money, I go to my list. It helps me get through the big things and the little things when I can be thankful anyway.

One of the things I am most thankful for each and every day is that our cars start. Really. It’s like top on my list and I can always be thankful for it. I mean, most of what I do revolves around me getting from Point A to Point B all day long. I drop the kids off to school, I pick them up, I run errands for our family, I go to meetings, I take kids to after-school commitments, and like most other parents, the list goes on and on. 

Besides the necessity of the car to do the things I need to do, I very much know what it is like to walk out, try to crank up the car, and it not start. This was a very common occurrence growing up. We were a large family with one car and truth be told, there was never enough money to go around. If the car didn’t start…okay, WHEN the car didn’t start…it meant so many things for our family. It meant not going where we needed to go. It meant someone had to find a way to get to the auto parts store to buy the needed part. It meant money that was already allocated to something else going to buy the needed part. And it meant one or both parents hunched over the open hood or sliding in and out on the hard ground from underneath the car trying to fix it. It also meant frustrations on top of frustrations for my parents, which they had no problem being vocal about.

So in my daily life, I am thankful each and every day that my car starts.

This morning we were scrambling to get to church early as our family was on the schedule to serve in the hospitality ministry. It was our job to be there to open the doors before Mass and to greet the other parishioners. I woke up on time, I woke up the kids on time, we got ready in time, we left on time. On the way in, my shoe fell apart! And they are super cute shoes! I was frustrated, but I just turned right around, drove myself home, got another pair of shoes, went back to church, and was there just before Mass started. My family was able to do my job until I returned. And in the midst of my frustration, as always, I was thankful my car started. I literally thought, a broken shoe is nothing compared to a car I can rely on to get me home and get me back in time. And I was thankful anyway!

After Mass once we were back home, I could see the house was a wreck! I decided I would help the kids out and give them a tour…you know, walk them around the house and let them see what I was seeing. There was a litany of:

“That’s not mine.” 

“I didn’t leave that there.”

“Why is she showing us this?” 

“Just tell us what you want us to do.”

And while I was ready to just scream my head off, I instead had them pick up, and we came up with a plan of how we can do better next week. Part of that plan was a good deep cleaning that I would start the next day. I just needed to go to the store and get some cleaning supplies. I was super thankful that, starting tomorrow, ALL five of our kids would be in school for the first time ever. I would be home by myself for the first time ever. I envisioned just cleaning and cleaning without interruption for the first time ever. Yes, the kids were cranky while picking up, but I had a plan and I was thankful anyway!

And that’s when it happened.  My broken shoes from this morning were out with the trash, I was leaving cranky kids at home, I had my cleaning supplies shopping list in hand, and I had a plan. 

And wouldn’t you know it, my car wouldn’t start!

Talk about frustrating! Tomorrow is our Pre-K son’s first day of school. Our oldest son who usually can help with drop-offs has early morning football practice. Not to mention the three different after-school meetings and commitments. Not to mention, I had my day of cleaning all planned out. Not to mention, my car starting is on my go-to list of things I am thankful for!

But you know, the car didn’t start. My hubby and I used his car to go stock up on cleaning supplies (and groceries, because who knows when I will have my car back). We came back and our neighbors helped out and let us borrow their jumper cables. My hubby was hot and sweaty trying to get the cables connected (these new cars just aren’t easy like the old ones) but he never once got loud or angry. When we discussed what the next day would look like, we easily came up with a plan, found rides for kids, and rearranged our day. Yes, this will be an added expense on top of a mountain of back to school expenses, but no one will go without. 

The truth is, I am frustrated about the car. But let’s face it, this is not the worst thing that could happen. The truth is, there is always, always something to be thankful for. I know this is a minor hiccup, but no matter how serious or how trivial, we really and truly can be thankful anyway.

I have found it very helpful to have a go-to list of things I am thankful for each and every day, and I suggest you do the same. I have looked at myself in the mirror through blood-shot eyes and tear-stained cheeks and have recited my list of things I am thankful for. I have used my go-to list through some of the hardest times in my life. My other suggestion would be you make that list longer than you think it should be. That way, when something from the list falls short, you can still be thankful anyway!